


Romeo and Johnathan

by Talyn_The_Ace



Series: Shakespeare But Gay [1]
Category: Romeo And Juliet - All Media Types
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, But the language is modernized, Genderbent Characters, M/M, Period Typical Attitudes, Period-Typical Homophobia, Period-Typical Racism, Period-Typical Sexism, just... set in the 1500s, same setting, so period-typical everything
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:20:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24814480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talyn_The_Ace/pseuds/Talyn_The_Ace
Summary: We read Romeo and Juliet for English class. Let's just say, I had a few complaints. Why does Juliet's dad go from being a supportive father to an asshole in like 2 days? Why is Tybalt such a dick? And for the love of god, why are these characters absolutely incapable of communicating for one goddamn second? I could go on and on, but you know what they say. 'If you don't like it, do it yourself.' And I intend to do exactly that. And anyway, everything can be more gay. Even a play written in the 1500s.
Relationships: Juliet Capulet/Romeo Montague
Series: Shakespeare But Gay [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1794880
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

The description says most of what I want to say, so let me start with some things I'm going to change for this fan fiction.

Gender changes include:  
1\. Juliet becomes male and Johnathan  
2\. The nurse becomes male and The doctor  
3\. Paris becomes female and stays Paris  
4\. The priest becomes female and becomes The priestess.  
5\. Possibly more but I can't remember them all

other changes include:  
1\. Romeo never loves Rosaline, he just says he does so he can hide the fact that he loves Johnathan  
2\. Instead of Paris demanding to marry Juliet, she instead requests his hand and he has the right to refuse. However, his dad pressures him anyway because he's almost out of marrying age.  
3\. Any and all characters presented under the age of 17 will now be 18. (because I feel uncomfortable implying underage sex)

4\. Rosaline is Johnathan's sister.  
5\. More will be explained as the story continues.

Anyway, let's get this party started! Don't expect me to ever update this regularly, I'm pretty sure my adhd will never let me do something consistently.


	2. Prologue

Two ancient households, both bonded although no relation is found, in fair Verona, we lay our scene. From old bonds forge new lovers, where civil bonds turn love unholy. From forth the fatal passion of these two unfortunate sinners, trapped in lawful situations. Do with their death bury their village’s strife. The fearful passage of their death-mark’d love, and the continuance of their society's rage, which, but their children’s end, nothing could remove. The which if you with patient ears attend, what here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend.


	3. Part 1; Section 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first two chapters of this fic have just kind of been introductory. This chapter, things actually start happening. See, it's like, until act 2 that things actually really start happening, so hopefully it won't be too terribly long.

Samson and Gregory turn the corner of the alleyway.

Sampson huffs, annoyed, and looks over at Gregory. “I swear, I can’t stand to do all this dirty work! I am a nobleman, I shouldn’t be treated like a servant, that’s what servants are for!”

Gregory snorts. “Well, with how you act sometimes, nobody would know the difference. You act as uncivilized as a servant any day.” He teases Samson.

“I should have never gotten in trouble for that silly mistake! I would rather kill someone than serve trash duty!”

“Maybe you should get yourself out of trouble first,” Sampson rolls his eyes at that, “before trying to murder someone for making you mad.”

“Well, I can’t control myself when I’m angry!” He vainly tries to defend himself.

Gregory looks at him with boredom. “And it’s _so hard_ to make you angry.”

“Being treated this way makes me angry.”

“You don’t say? Not like I’ve been listening to you complain about that exact thing for almost half an hour now. I’d like to see you do something about it for once instead of coming to cry to me.”

Sampson comments, “Who is crying? Not me. No way. I’m too busy pushing women against the walls and ravishing them. Women are weak to my charms, so of course they all fall into my lap.”

“Of course they do, I’m sure,” Gregory remarks, “and do they take your head, or do you simply take their maidenheads?” “Whichever you’d prefer to think about. Take that in whatever sense you will.”

“The women you rape are the ones who’ll have to “sense” it.”

“Rape? That’s a little harsh, how dare you insult my impressive length like that? The women certainly aren’t complaining!”

“It’s a good thing your length is ‘impressive’ because your looks aren’t doing you any favors. You look like an old man, and your flirting skills aren’t any better.”

They finally made it to the end of the marketplace where they came to buy their wares, but right as they arrived at the storefront, they saw a commotion around the bend of the street. They silently looked at each other, deciding if they were going to see what the commotion was all about. Walking around, they saw two young men, barely 19, being whipped in the town square, tied to wooden crosses. Gregory did not believe in these types of punishments, Sampson knew, but he had no way of stopping the other man from running up to the whipped man and putting a stop to the beatings happening.

“What is the meaning of this?” Shouted the punisher, who was confused at a nobleman stopping the punishments of two criminals.

“If you’ll allow it, I’d like to deal with the prisoner’s punishments another way.”

“Excuse me?” The punisher yelled at him, “These men are under specific orders to be tried for satanism under homosexuality! Execution is standard punishment!”

“I am aware. But under my orders, I would like to authorize a duel! Let me fight the prisoners to their ultimate demise!” Sampson rolled his eyes at his over-the-top friend, wishing he could stop him when he clearly couldn’t.

“Excuse me?” The punisher asked yet again at the audacious orders. Of course, the punisher would eventually give in because in the end, Gregory outclassed this low level punisher, no doubt getting the fight he itches for.

Not 10 minutes later, the two men were untied and handed swords by the crowd, now immensely curious as to what Gregory was doing, making this scene in front of everyone. Sampson was also pulled into the fight, opting for a sword as well and aiding Gregory in his fool’s errand. With the cheering of the crowd behind him, the banter begins.

Sampson leans over to Gregory and asks out of the side of his mouth, “Should I bite my thumb at them?”

“The law is already on our side, but it might not be if you bite your thumb at them.”

“But they were tried to be whipped to death.” Sampson points out.

“I suppose I can’t stop you. Bite your thumb if you must.” Sampson looks over at the two hovering criminals and bites his thumb at them. Even to two criminals, this is an extremely offensive gesture.

“Are you biting your thumb at us?” The clearly more easily-riled-up one yells at the pair.

“I’m biting my thumb.”

“But are you biting your thumb at us?” He replies, angrily.

“Is the law still on our side if I say yes?” Sampson asks Gregory out of the side of his mouth.

“No.” Gregory replies to Sampson.

“No, but I am biting my thumb, sir.” Sampson addresses the men.

“Are you trying to start a fight, sirs?” Abram asks across the way.

Sampson scoffs at the swords drawn around him. “Start a fight? Whatever gives you that idea?”

“I don’t want to fight. I was happily ready to accept my punishment.”

“Well, what’s one more embarrassment to add to the piling list before your execution,” Sampson goads, “if you are so eager to die.”

“Who said I’ll die?” 

“Then fight and prove that you can win. Maybe if you beat me you’ll live.”

Abram decides that this is when they should start fighting. It’s a short fight when a bystander that wasn’t there for the whole exchange comes onto the scene. Benvolio sees the fight taking place and draws his own sword.

“Stop! Stop! If this man is to hang for his crimes, he must hang for his crimes! Don’t start a fight when it can only end two ways!”

Sampson smiles at Benvolio, and says, “Yes, it can only end… with my victory!” He goes to slash at Abram again.

Tybalt enters the scene and sees the two fighting, but he notices that Benvolio also has his sword drawn. “What are you doing, Benvolio, fighting these idiots. They deserve whatever punishment they get!”

“I wasn’t fighting! I was trying to stop the fighting!” The fighting resumed, and Benvolio put his sword away, bowing out of the situation.

Eventually, however, things got worse. People off the streets entered the fray, shouting, “Kill the faggots! Kill the satanists!” Looking at the two men that were being beaten, one was protecting the other, trying to keep him alive.

But there were too many people for one person to be enough. Just as both men began losing consciousness, two nobles walked by. Montague and his beautiful wife noticed the fighting and pulled everyone off the two men. “What is going on here?” He bellowed. The situation was very quickly explained.

“I see! M’lady, please give me my sword!” 

His wife smirked at him and replied, “A sword, don’t you mean a crutch? Let the people do whatever they please, but don’t muddy your hands with these peasants.” 

“Oh, shut up and let me do what I want, woman!” 

She rolls her eyes and hands him his sword. He marches into the crowd and the sea parts for him. He looks down at the cowering people on the ground. He stabbed the man right through and pushed it further into the second man, who were both crying. 

Everyone suddenly began bowing, right after this event took place. Montague turned to see the prince standing there, looking distatefully at the corpse. 

“If you please, I am tired of all the murder that happens in the streets. These men were meant to be punished, that’s not news, but please, just let them be punished by the church instead of all this stupidity.” He says with his hand on his own sword, not because he was going to need to fight anyone, but for astetic’s sake. “I hereby forbid fighting in the streets unless justified through me first!” He says, before quickly leaving the scene. 

The people, now bored with a lack of fighting, began to leave and go about their days like they were before. The Montagus turned and looked at the nobleman that started it all. 

“Simple groceries, and this is what I arrive at? You, fighting these satanists, with no thoughts behind your actions other than petty spite. What were you doing? What part did you play in this mess?”

“When I got there, they were already getting mobbed, and I was trying to pull people off them but got caught in the fray.” He lied through his teeth at his uncle. “Then Benvolio got involved, trying to help fight the crowd off the suffering men, but once he found out what they did, the goddamn faggots, he too attacked and the situation further escalated after that. There was nothing I could do about it, but I couldn’t get out of the crowd. I barely managed when the prince arrived.”

Lady Montague chimed in before Montague was able to talk. “Where is Romeo? I thought he was with you? Please don’t tell me he was involved.” 

“Before the sun came up, I saw him on my morning walk before all this started. I haven’t seen him since, so no, he wasn’t involved as far as I know. I’m sure he would never let himself be caught up in a situation like that.” Benvolio reassures Lady Montague. 

Montague looked his nephew up and down. “I saw Romeo leave in the middle of the might. This isn’t the first time lately. He always leaves crying. I’ve asked him about it but he never wants to talk. He leaves and as soon as the sun comes up, he goes back to his room and locks himself up, covering his windows, not leaving until we force him to.”

“Uncle,” Benvolio looks at Montague, “Do you know why he’s acting like this?”

“I don’t know and can’t get him to talk.” 

“Have you tried to force it out of him?”

“I have, I got my friends too, he won’t talk. I’m concerned about him… For him to be so tight-lipped about something, I’m concerned about what’s going on. If he doesn’t talk about it, we can’t help him. It might be something easy for us to solve. But who knows with that boy.” 

“Look, here he comes! Great timing.”

“If only he could come when we aren’t talking about him.” Montague groans. “Come on, madam, let’s go.”

She took his arm and they walked away through the crowd. 

“Good morning, cousin.” Benvolio said. 

“Is it really that early?” He groaned, with bags under his eyes. 

“It’s just after 9 o’clock.” He muttered. 

“Time goes slow when you’re sad, I suppose. Anyway, was that my dad I just saw leave?” 

“It was. Why are you sad, anyway?”

“I want something that I can’t have.”

“Are you in love, Romeo?” 

“More like… out of love.” 

“Out of love?” Benvolio looked at him strangely. 

“Well, I like someone, but I’m sure they don’t feel the same way.” Romeo said, eyeing Benvolio, praying to god that he’d gotten better at lying. 

“And tell me about this love that has been troubling you lately.” Benvolio gave Romeo a little push with his shoulder. 

“If love is supposed to be given by god, why does it force me to want to do unholy things for the person I love? Why does love make me blind? Where should we eat?” He noticed the blood on the ground, “What happened here? Wait, don’t tell me, it had something to do with hate, but more to do with love. I cannot tell if I love or if I’m just lonely. The love I feel is wrong, unholy, unreciprocated. It grates on me that I feel this way towards one that doesn’t feel the same. I only wish for their happiness. I can only hope that one day I might bring them joy. Love and hate aren’t so different. Love is everything and nothing.”

“That’s really depressing, cuz.”

“Well, that’s how I feel.” 

“I can see you really like her. Go after her, man, you’re never gonna forgive yourself if you don’t give it a shot.” 

“I don’t know…” 

“Well, who is it?” Benvolio asked. 

“You know the Capulets?” Romeo asked warily.

“Yes…” 

“It’s Johnathan-’s sister Rosaline.” 

“Ah, Rosaline. A beautiful young lady. I see why you have your eye on her.” 

“Yes, but I believe she was promised chastity...” Romeo said, tired already of the lies bound to come. 

“Rosaline, the Capulet’s prize daughter? Promised chastity? Heavens, no. Capulet would never allow that. In fact, she’s currently looking for a suitor if memory serves me right.” Benvolio said. 

“Wait! Are you serious? She isn’t promised chastity?”

“God, no. In fact, we could go this very instant and ask for her hand if you so wished, cuz.” 

“Oh… Maybe later.”

“Why, it still saddens you, I’m sure, to be knocked off your kilter like that. 

“Oh, sorry, I don’t feel like myself today. Romeo is somewhere else right now.”

“Oh? Are you that desperate for the woman of your dreams? Well, if you need assistance, let's go! We can meet up with her right now and you can smooth talk your way to her heart, I am sure of it.”

“I wouldn’t even know where to begin. First, let me go home and figure out a course of action.” 


	4. Part 1; Section 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have made the executive decision that even though it’s not period accurate, women are allowed to ask for men’s hand in marriage, but men have the option to refuse.  
> Also, homophobia, mysogony, period-typical stuff. (This is the 15th century, after all.)  
> Tell me if I miss any tag!  
> -Sam

Paris decided that she had nothing to loose, and so she arranged a meetup with Sir Capulet. “And you are saying you wish to request my son’s hand in marriage?”

“Yes, sir Capulet, I am. I am an honorable woman with strong social standing and believe myself to be a loyal woman. What do you think of my proposal?”

“My son may be 19, but he isn’t nearly as experienced with the world as he could be. Give him time, meet him, show him the world before requesting this of him. Let him have a choice in the say. I can’t force him to do anything.”

“Just, please, tell him I’ve offered, let him have the idea in his mind.” Paris politely told Capulet.

“Alright, I will. But first, I want you to meet him.”

“And when am I supposed to do that?”

“How about you meet him when we have that birthday party for him. It was already planned and not too far off. You can meet him at the party and then decide if you and him hit it off. In the end, it’s his decision whether he will have you.”

“Of course.”

“Speaking of,” Capulet folds a piece of paper he’d been working on, handing it to a nearby servant, “This is a list of everyone I wish to attend the party. Please seek them out and tell them that I would be pleased if they could attend my party.”

Capulet sees Miss Paris out, and the servant looks blankly at the paper.

“If only I knew how to read.” He mutters to himself, right as Romeo and Benvolio enter.

“All you need to do is get outside! Go enjoy life, it’s okay. You need help getting out, you need to build your confidence so you can court your special lady! I believe in you! We just need a good time to ask her to marry you!” Benvolio said to Romeo, thoroughly convinced that Romeo can get his maiden.

“When would be a good time, do you think?” Romeo asked.

“Well, I don’t know, but I’m sure Capulet is planning a party. He almost always has some sort of social gathering in the works. You can just wait for one of those and make your move then.”

The servant was done staring emptily at the paper and turned to someone else for help. “Excuse me, can you read?”

“Yes, if I know the language, I can read the paper.”

“Well, here, can you tell me what it says?”

“Yes, it says,

‘Signior Martino and his wife and daughters; County Anselme and his beauteous daughters;the lady widow of vitravio; Noble count Montague and his wife and son;Signior Placentio and his lovely nieces;Mercutio and his brother Valentine; Mine uncle Capulet, his wife and daughters; Livia; Signior Valentino and his cousin Tybalt, Lucio and the lovely Helena.’ That’s quite a list of guests! Where should they go?”

“To my master’s home for dinner.”

“Who’s your master?” Romeo eyed the servant.

“My master is the capulet home. Now, if you wish to attend, all noblemen in the kingdom are permitted, but beware. Only come with a costume and nothing else. Identities are not to be known at this party. Have a good day!”

Benvolio looks to Romeo right as he leaves, understanding immediately what this means and more than happy to spell it out for Romeo. “You know who’ll be at the party? Rosaline! The woman you love! Isn’t that magnificent? You can go, woo her, and walk away a taken man! You have such a charm about you that there is no chance she will be able to resist!”

“Men don’t own women.” Romeo mentioned.

“Oh, of course they do! Women are too stupid to understand anything at all! At least you chose one of the most beautiful of all of them.”

“Oh, yes, I did. Her eyes are the most beautiful of all the women in the land. His eyes shine like a thousand diamonds. His hair reflects all the hues of the forest. He is the most beautiful m-woman I’ve ever seen. And I will see her again at the party.”

“I’ll go long, ya know, for emotional support in wooing your lady.” He says unconvincingly.

“Sure” Romeo says, laughing. 


End file.
